Common Sense Practical Advice:
You will want to read this if you are a home owner, you care about your appliances, or, you are bored and desire to be entertained.
Appliance Repair For Dummies 101
Good a' title as any, ...I guess.
This is the part where I give you practical advice and some "straight talk" about your appliances.
Washers, Dryers, Dishwashers, Garbage Disposals, Compactors, Microwaves, Ovens, Stoves, Ranges, Furnaces
Washers:
There are 4 stages in a wash x 2. Fill, cycle, drain, and spin. There really isn't much that you can do for preventative maintenance on a washing machine. And, there are so many different body style designs that I could never, in good conscience, recommend attempting a repair on your own unless you are educated on how your machine comes apart. If you do this, and lose all the screws, and "I" have to re-assemble it, ...well, ...I charge ten dollars extra for that. LOL However, for those of you currently seeking to buy a new one, here is some basic information that you may find valuable.
There are 2 styles, top loaders and front loaders.
Top loaders are available with 2 different drive trains. There are belt driven and there are direct drive models. The only real difference is that belt drive models have a belt, and direct drive models do not. Top loaders typically use about 30 gallons of water per load. They spin out at approximately 600 to 800 rpms depending on what model you have. In the state of California, top loaders are currently being banned and phased out for the sake of water conservation due to an ongoing drought and low water table. If your washer is over 25 years old and the timer goes bad, buy a new washer. They are built far more energy efficient now than they were back then. You will save enough money on electricity for your investement to pay for itself quickly. In the years after that it becomes profit earned by what you save every time you wash your clothes.
Front loaders are more expensive to buy at first, but they are so much more efficient in energy savings and performance that they will usually pay for themselves within 2 to 3 years, which makes them a better investment for the long haul. They typically use about 5 gallons of water per load and spin out at approximately 1200 to 1600 rpms. Your clothes are almost completely dry at the end of the cycle which cuts dry time by more than half. You save on water and electricity. Always try to avoid washing carpets, rugs, and houspets in your washing machine. (grin) This will save wear and tear on your pump and motor. When your washing machine breaks down, usually, it will be well worth repairing, unless, it is a complete ...rust bucket. Call a technician.
Dryers:
There are 2 types of dryers, gas and electric.
The basis on which you choose to buy one will, usually, be decided by the type of utilities you use in your home. Otherwise, they all basically operate by the same principles. Heat, vent, and tumble. If you notice that any one of these things are not happening, then, something is wrong. The only preventative maintenance you can do is keep the lint screen clean and be sure there are no obstructions in your vent. The formula for vent chasing is as follows: 30 feet with no bends, 20 feet with 1 bend, 10 feet with 2 bends. Any configuration outside these parameters will cause the unit to not dry efficiently. If it heats at all, check your venting before calling a technician. This could save you a service call. As with washers, unless you have a complete rust bucket, a dryer will usually be worth repairing, ...as long as you avoid running it over with the car. The stories I could tell. LOL All modern dryers come with factory built in safety components. Lint fires are very rare and usually only occur if the dryer is not vented properly, or, has built up lint accumulation next to the burner or heat element, or, you light it on fire with a match. All dryers are dangerous if not attended to properly! If you are concerned about this, have it checked out by a professional. If you experience any problems with a dryer, unplug the unit immediately and call a technician. If it dances, sings, or whistles, ...call an exorcist or a shrink. (grin)
Dishwashers:
A very delicate subject. There are three stages in a wash x 2. Fill, cycle, and drain. Same as a washing machine, only, leave out the spin part. Well, ...just think about it for a second. You see? LOL ...Okay. Here, we do have something to talk about! You may get agitated when I say this, but, I have to say it anyway. If your hot water temperature is less than 120 degrees, your dishwasher does not work. Period. If you think it does, then you are disillusioned. Detergent does not even activate at any less than 120 degrees, no matter what kind you use. A reference to good health. You can adjust the temperature of your hot water to 120 degrees by turning the little knob on your water heater ...to ...120 degrees. (grin) Aside from that, issues with wash-ability, cloudiness, etching, or suds, are always attributable to over use of detergent. Yes, I said "over use"! Glass is made out of sand. Know what detergent is made out of? Sand! That's right folks! If anyone asks, well, ...you just tell 'em "Robo" told you so! Oh, ...detergent can cause "all kinds" of problems. LOL Most manufacturers tell you to fill both cups. Absolutely do not do this! I simply cannot stress this enough. No matter what type of detergent you use, never use more than 2 tablespoons! If you are using capsules, break them in half. It's just too much! Using too much detergent will cause damage to your pump seals, your door gasket, the rubber coating on your dish racks, your dishes, glasses, plastic, silverware, your plumbing, and your septic system. Furthermore, ...I must insist that you, please, ...always use a rinse aid, ...such as Jet Dry. Rinse aids are evaporating agents. All dishwashers require the use of rinse aid. That is the way they were designed! Follow my prescription and your dishes will come out immaculate, you will save money on repairs, septic maintenance, and ..."detergent"! Now, ...here is a lesson ...better reading about ...rather than learning it on your own. Listen very closely! Are you listening? Get real close to the screen. "Never", I repeat, "never" use dish soap, hand soap, body wash, shampoo, laundry detergent, or any other type of cleaning chemicals or agents in your dishwasher. Most other detergents are very highly concentrated. If you do this, ...whether it be intentional, ...or by accident, ...there is a very ...definite chance ...that you are going ...to be having...
... a "flood!" "LOL!"
Shit! ...Shut the damn thing off! Hurry up! For Christ sake, you're flooding the kitchen floor! Hurry up! Hit the button! Pull the latch! Open the door! Do something! Fast! Holy crap! Don't panic! What a freakin' mess! Just stop the damn thing right now!! Didn't I just tell you not to do that? Well, didn't I?? Yes I did!! I just told you, not even 30 seconds ago!!! Didn't I ??? I distinctly remember telling you not to do that!!!! (grin) Note: I do not usually say words like shit, damn, or hell when I'm in a customers house. After all, I am tryin' to run a freakin' company. LOL It's just not proper etiquette. However, for sake of expression here in this environment, I figure, ...if you are old enough to be able to read this material, and ...are mature enough to have an interest in the first place, ...you have most certainly heard those words before! (freaking out)
Okay, ...now, ...if this happens to you, I suggest that you clean up the water right away before it warps your hardwood floor and your spouse comes home from work and sees it! I do not do marriage counseling! Once you get the mess cleaned up, take all the dishes out and put them in the sink. Now, you have to get the water out of the dishwasher. If you run it, ...well. So scoop out the water with a coffee cup. You can now run the machine for 30 seconds. Let it fill, run it for ...30 seconds, and drain it. Now you can run it through a whole cycle. I recommend , actually, running it through at least 3 to 5 cycles with no detergent whether it is still leaking or not. As much as you hate doing dishes by hand ...I'm afraid there's no way around it. Take some aspirin and get it done. The reason this happened is that water can become over saturated, especially when using a softener system. In otherwords, it becomes "too wet". Contrary to popular belief, ...you should never have suds in your dishwasher. Suds are an indication of using to much detergent. If your dishwasher is running well, and, out of the blue, it suddenly develops even a slight leak at the bottom of the door, you are probably using too much ...what? ..."Detergent!" Damn it! LOL See? Isn't this fun? Okay, well I'm havin' a good time with you. You are all great folks, ...for reading ...this. I applaud you. "Golf clap." You are smarter than I thought. Keep going ...your doing good now. If it leaks from underneath and the water just "rolls" out, your pump is leaking. If your dishwasher will not fill, cycle or drain, ...call a technician.
Water heaters:
There are many types of water heaters. Some are gas and some are electric. The type you buy will be based on what type of utilities you have in your house. Water heaters have 2 valves. A pressure relief valve at the top, and a drain valve at the bottom. If you want to extend the life of a water heater, you must perform a regular routine maintenance procedure involving the 2 valves. You should be doing this once every 3 months. The procedure is called a "blow down" and goes as follows: Use a bucket to catch the water. Pop the top valve and let some water out. If the water is orange, run until clear. You have just skimmed the top. Now open the bottom valve until the orange water runs clear. You have just skimmed the bottom. And that's it! You have just blown down your water heater. Following this protocol will "double" or even "triple" the life of your water heater if you do it from the start of a new installation, ...and it takes less than 5 minutes and doesn't cost you a dime!!
Garbage Disposals:
Okay, now, ...first of all, ...do not dump an entire pan of moldy broccoli and cheese into your disposal all at once ...and "not" expect a jam! Turn on the "hot" water and carefully feed it in just a little at a time. You'll just have to deal with the smell. LOL ....Well, ...hey, ...you cooked it! Secondly, you absolutely should grind up 2 heaping handfulls of ice cubes once a month. This will keep the blades sharp. Always run hot water (at least 120 degrees) (grin) while grinding food. This will prevent fatty solids from forming on the inside of your pipes. Do not ever, I repeat, again, for a second time redundantly, do not ever ...put anything into the disposal that is not of "grind-able" material or you will damage the blades. Also, if you have a jam, do not ever put your hand, your foot, or, any other body part into the garbage disposal. Use someone elses. Call a technician! Another reference to good health.
Garbage Compactors:
Well, apparently, I don't really have a lot to say about these, ..according to the information. They are nice to have around but when they break down, it is usually not an emergency unless you happen to be missing one of your housepets. LOL If it does happen, chances are, you will probably not be able to repair it yourself. That's pretty much all there is to it! If you happen to have done this, ...please write an entry into my comment blog and tell me about it. I love a good story. LOL Otherwise, considering what you paid for it when you bought it, ...they are usually well worth having repaired. Call a technician!
Microwaves:
There are 2 types, countertop and overhead.
Countertop microwaves are not worth repairing unless you spent over $300.00 to buy it! That's just all there is to that! Overhead microwaves are almost always worth repairing as long as you spent over $500.00. Not much to go on, huh. Well, if something goes wrong here, unplug the unit immediately and call a professional! No messing around on these. Microwaves can be extremely dangerous! Now, we all know not to put any metal objects in there right? So, you ask, what practical advice can I give you on these? Okay, ...never crawl inside your microwave, close the door, and set it for 3 and a half minutes! This could hurt you or a loved one! When running, the transformer puts out 2000 volts. If you take one apart, watch out! There is a capacitor in there that holds a charge even when it's not plugged in! Warning, ...all you big, strong, brauny, macho, hairy chested guys, trying to make an impression on your gal. ...I say that because I only have 1 ...hair ...on my chest ...that I have been coddling and nurturing and trying to preserve since ...puberty. You would be better off saving yourself some possible embarassment and just leaving it the hell alone! If you touch "that thing" the wrong way, it will blast you across the kitchen floor, your wife will be on the phone with 911, and you will be taking a horizontal ride to the hospital where you will spend the next day on a heart monitor! How do I know? Well, ...you just don't do this kind of work for as long as I have without gettin' ..."lit up" ...every now and then. LOL Save yourself the trouble. Keep your chest hair. As much as you "don't" want to, ...please, ...call a damn technician! LOL
Ovens, Stoves, and Ranges:
Oven = Built into the wall.
Stove = Cooktop. Built into the counter.
Range = Free standing, or built in, contains both an oven, and a stove.
There are 3 types, gas, electric, and hybrid or "dual fuel". (gas and electric)
All 3 operate on the same basic principles as a dryer only leave out the "tumble" part. (grin) Just heat and vent. (wink) Well, ...just think about it for a sec. You see? LOL Okay, ...the most common problems associated with any of "these" is: no heat! (grin) All of these have thermostats, controls, and sometimes, boards. The only basic difference in how they operate is in their source of heat. Electrics run on 220 volts. This will not only light up your eyeballs, but, it will, also, "body-slam" you to the floor. Just because you heard it from me does not give you cause to go and try it. How do I know? Uhhh, ...well. (grin) Yup! Now, electrics have what are called "elements" and gas burners have "igniters". These, both, burn out like a light bulb, and, eventually, they will! No way around it. If you are attempting to replace an element on your own, make absolutely sure you unplug the unit before doing this. There are 2 wires connected to the element and 1 is always hot. Remember what I just said about 220? LOL (Ouch! Holy crap!) If you have a problem with over cooking or undercooking, first ...make sure it's not the cook. (grin) These can usually be calibrated within 20 degrees up or down. Not the cook, ... silly, ...the oven. Cooks can only be calibrated by "your reaction" to the meal that they just worked so hard to make for you. Usually not more than 4 or 5 degrees anyway, ...unless you're "real" frisky. Call a ...what? A technician! Very good. Note: If you have a glass top, avoid spillovers at all cost. Although you can't tell by looking, glass is porous. When it is hot, the pores are open and when it is cold the pores are closed. That is called "expansion" and "contraction". When you spillover, the sequence is as follows: The glass is hot and the pores are open. The beef barley soup boils over. The soup hits the glass. The glass cools. The pores close. Now you have beef barley soup permanently embedded into the glass. That is there for good! You can never clean that off! It's just that simple. Now, ...you didn't listen too me on the dishwasher, do you want to find "this" out the hard way too? Those glass tops are very expensive to replace. So, for "your" sake, I hope you're paying attention now! (not grinning)
Furnaces:
The same basic principles apply with furnaces as do ovens, stoves and ranges. Heat and vent. Now, ...furnaces are the most dangerous of them all! They are "quite deadly"! Not only could you go out with a "bang", but, these creatures are also notorious for killing in silence, at night, when it's dark in the house, when not a creature is stirring, not even a mouse. That's right, I'm talking about carbon monoxide. It is absolutely crucial that your furnace runs properly and precisely as this is such a finely tuned instrument. All that I will tell you is keep the filters clean and make sure you have a nice, crisp, clean blue flame at all times. Are you scared? Well, don't be. All modern furnaces have factory built in safety components just like all other modern appliances. Gas and exhaust have 2 completely different smells. It is very important for you to be able to tell the difference. Gas smells like a rotting carcass and exhaust smells like burnt fuel. If you ever smell gas, and it is in any way overwhelming, get the hell out of the house, run to a neighbor and dial 911! Folks, I cannot stress this enough. Even just a little static electricity created by "you" picking up the telephone can set off an explosion! So, ...please heed my warning on this! If you smell exhaust or see soot, ...shut the furnace off and call a technician. If you really are worried, ...well, you should talk to your shrink about this. Otherwise, you can buy a carbon monoxide detecter at your local hardware store. They aren't that expensive. Actually, I suggest it, just because ...I care! Change your filter every 3 months and that's it. Another reference to good health. (heavy sigh)
Repair work on all seal systems related to cooling equipment of any kind requires a specialized federal license issued by the EPA
Refrigerators and Freezers:
There are 2 numbers that I want you to remember. They are 0 and 36! You need 2 thermometers. I'm just bettin' that, probably, ...right about now, ...yer thinkin' ..."naw"! Well, ...then ...think - a-damn-gain! Have I lied to ya' yet? Think about it. Are ya' thinkin'? Ya' know what else I'm bettin'? I'm bettin' that after you read "this", you will put a thermometer in your freezers and your refrigerators right in a position where you can see them readily when you open the door! That's what I'm bettin'! What were the magic numbers? Wanna know why? The freezer should be at 0 because that is the temperature that keeps your frozen food freshest longest! If you have a built in modular ice maker, 0 is also the factory designed temperature that runs "it" best no matter what brand you have. Your ice maker should harvest 1 dump per hour. That's 12 cubes. 288 cubes per day, for you math experts. Too warm runs slow. Too cold runs slow. Hint: If you open your freezer door and see a "blizzard", your freezer is too cold. You are burning your food. Make an adjustment! The refrigerator gets its cold air from the freezer. If the freezer gets too cold it can freeze the food in your refrigerator. Ahhh, nothing tastes better than frozen lettuce. (yuk) Why 36 in the refrigerator? Salmanella, that's food poisoning y'all! Spreads like wildfire. If This happens, ...yer gonna know it, trust me on this one, (grin) and, ...remember the dishwasher incident! Need I say more? Okay. Even at 32 degrees, your fresh food is deteriorating. But, at 36, you can control it for a bit of time and you won't risk freezing the food in your refrigerator. At 38 your milk won't last 3 days. Trouble keeping those temperatures? Clean the condenser once a year. If you don't know what one is, (grin) or, if that doesn't solve the problem, ...call a technician. To prolong the life of the door gaskets, simply wipe them down with warm soapy water once a month. This will prevent rotting and tearing due to sticky food spills.
Ice Machines:
You think all that other stuff was complicated? These either work, or they do not work. There are relays, reversing valves, pressure switches, thermal sensors, computor controls, evaporators, condensers, compressors, fans, ...and I could go on and on! Clean the condenser once a year. And, ...again, if you do not know what one is, call a technician. If you have trouble with your water quality, install an in-line filter. And, ...that's it folks! There! We just simplified a "huge" array of possible difficulties. We also just saved a whole lot of my writing time and your reading time as well. Too many things can go wrong to list "here". If you have any questions, ...please, ...feel free to call me. (989)666-5023 I would be quite happy to explain it too you! If you have enough money to buy one, ...you can afford to have it repaired once in a while. That's really all you need to know about these. (grin) I know just how incredibly important it is to have ice. So, ...get on the phone ...and call a technician.
Window Air Conditioners, Central Air Conditioners, and Dehumidifiers:
Freon should never just leak unless there is a direct cause for that. It is against the law to "top off" the freon without making the necessary repairs in order to stop the leak. If you paid less than 1000 dollars for your unit and the compressor goes out and it is out of warranty, (always make sure) don't bother having this one repaired. It is just not a wise investment. Buy a new one. Anyway, make sure you know ...that is what the problem is first! 95% of the time, the problem is not going to be related to freon, or the compressor, rather coils being clogged and not getting enough air flow. The clogging usually happens on the inside of the case. They will lose their efficiency and you will call me. I will take it apart and clean it, from the inside out. This should be done every 3 years routinely. Otherwise, you are spending more money on electricity, and, overheating the compressor, which will cause it not to cool properly, until it eventually ...sputters out. It does require a license to repair these unless the problem is electical or mechanical, such as a fan, a relay, or a switch in which case, fiddle at your own risk. You know what that means. Right? These have capacitors just like microwaves. It only takes one good jolt, ...and you won't be doing that anymore! Well, ...in most cases anyway. "You", ...I'm not so sure about! LOL You better know what you are doing! Otherwise, just don't go near the damn things! Clean the condensers once a year or have a professional do it and leave it alone. And that's it! If you have "any" problems whatsoever, ...do I really need to say it? LOL Well, ...okay, ...here goes. ...Call a technician!
Digital Electronics: (computers, chips, and boards)If you have a computer, you know it is wise to have it on a surge protector. The usual way is to plug the surge protector into the wall and plug your computer into that. Well, if you are like most people, you might have , say, a stereo, or , a big screen television. Do you have surge protection on those? The truth is, almost all appliances built today, including washers, dryers, dishwashers, microwaves, ovens, stoves, ranges, downdrafts, vent hoods, refrigerators, freezers, ice machines, humidifiers, dehumidifiers, compactors, furnaces, ...and more, have computer chips, and boards. (Here we go with the "and more" thing again.) These can be expensive to replace, especially if you have a lightning hit that takes out 6 or 8 of them all at once! Or more! Okay, well, ...you see? Isn't this fun? LOL It is just not very convenient to have 20 surge protectors scattered all over the house. So, ...I recommend that if you have any concern about this, you can call an electrician and have them install a surge protector right at your circuit breaker box, cable, and phone line utilities. There is no way to control a lightning hit! However, if you have "main" protection, you can file a claim against the company that produced it, and they will have to honor your claim. It's the law! A surge protector is an insurance policy. I always take a lot of calls after a good thunderstorm. (grin)
Warranties:
Always keep your proof of purchase or receipt when buying a new appliance. Manufacturers are required to honor a one year warranty on all mechanical and electrical components. It's the law! Sealed system components such as compressors, evaporators, and condensers on any kind of cooling equipment must be covered for five years. Again, ...it's the law! Some manufacturers actually cover their products for 2 years or more on mechanicals and electricals simply for the sake of good public relations. You should always fill out the warranty card that comes with the appliance when you buy it, and send it in as required by the manufacturer. This will help you by giving you more credibility if and/or when you attempt to file a claim. You must present proof of purchase to the place where you bought the appliance, in order to proceed with any claim. I recommend keeping receipts from all major purchases for ten years. It is just a good practice to follow.
Technicians:
If a technician ever tries to sell you a repair at a cost of more than 75% of what it would cost to buy new, and uses high pressure sales tactics, ...throw him out of your house immediately! Do not let him back in! Not even for coffee! And, ...make sure he takes all his damn tools with him! LOL He is not your friend. Call his company and lodge a complaint. This is called "gouging" and it goes against the technicians code of ethics. A licensed and seasoned technician will have knowledge in physics, chemistry, electricity, mechanical movement, plumbing, soldering, safety, warranty laws, manufacturer specifications, phsychology, social ediquette, standards and practices in the field. They will be familiar with the EPA laws associated with their licensure, and, ...at the very least, like myself, ...they will not use words like "shit", "damn", or "hell" while doing service in a customers house. LOL After all, ...there may be small children present. When dealing with a technician in your home, if you want respectable service, there is one general principal that you can apply. "Be good to your technician and your technician will be good to you." LOL Oh, ...and, ...well, ...if you have indoor mountain lions, ...please, ...lock them in the bedroom before you answer the door. LOL (jeees o peeets) The stories I could tell. Anyway, ...the truth is, ...I need your business just as much as you need your appliances fixed. Well, I told you I would give you some straight talk about your appliances. I guess it just doesn't get much straighter than that. I'm sure you are aware of how bored I must have been to write all this stuff. Well, business is slow. LOL Anyway, we did have a little fun, and now you know that ...I really do ...care. And, ...RoboJoe Industries Major Appliance Repair Service just "rocks"! LOL That's right! Don't you know? If you happened to actually enjoy this article, please, ...go to: www.merchantcircle.com and type in our phone number. We would greatly appreciate a reference from you.
Thank you.
Blessings,
Robo